Couple Counselling
"The drama of love is all about this hunger for safe emotional connection. Love is not the icing on the cake of life. It is a basic primary need, like oxygen or water." – Dr. Sue Johnson, psychologist and founder of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT)
Couple counselling, also called ‘relationship counselling’ or ‘marriage counselling‘, provides a supportive space to navigate relationship challenges, improve communication, and deepen emotional connection. Whether you're facing recurring conflicts, struggling with trust, or simply wanting to strengthen your bond, couple therapy can help you and your partner understand each other’s needs, attachment styles, triggers, and mindsets. In addition to couple therapy and marriage counselling, our couple therapy services also include pre-marital counselling and divorce counselling.
Here are some of the things couple counselling can help you with:
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Dr John Gottman, the Founder of Gottman Couple Therapy once said, "The goal in marriage is not to think alike, but to think together." In conflict resolution, it’s not about agreeing on everything or having identical viewpoints, but rather about coming together as a team to address challenges, listen to each other’s perspectives, and find solutions that work for both partners. Counsellors providing couple counselling/relationship counselling help to promote mindsets of empathy, respect, and compromise, helping couples navigate disagreements with a focus on shared goals rather than winning or being right.
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Pre-marital counselling helps couples lay a strong foundation for their future together by addressing key areas such as communication skills, financial management, intimacy, family dynamics, lifestyle habits, and parenting. It also covers sexual health and intimacy, fostering understanding of each other's needs while boosting confidence. Couples also discuss the impact of family relationships, define roles and responsibilities, and balance relationships with extended family.
Additionally, pre-marital counselling helps couples align on lifestyle preferences, cultivate shared interests, and establish long-term plans for parenting and education, ensuring a well-rounded approach to building a lasting, fulfilling partnership.
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Couple counseling can be an essential part of rebuilding trust after infidelity. Here’s how therapy can support this process:
Providing a Safe Space for Open Communication – Infidelity can create a lot of emotional pain and confusion. A counselor helps facilitate honest, non-judgmental conversations where both partners can express their feelings and concerns. This open communication is crucial for healing.
Understanding the Underlying Issues – Counseling helps both partners explore the root causes of the infidelity, such as unmet needs, poor communication, or personal issues. Addressing these factors can reduce the likelihood of future betrayals and promote long-term healing.
Helping the Betrayed Partner Process Emotions – The partner who has been betrayed may experience anger, sadness, and betrayal. A counselor helps them process these emotions, supporting them in healing rather than suppressing their feelings.
Helping the Offending Partner Take Responsibility – Counseling helps them express remorse, understand the impact of their actions, and demonstrate accountability, which is essential for rebuilding trust.
Setting Boundaries and Rebuilding Safety – The therapist helps both partners set clear boundaries and expectations moving forward, creating a foundation for trust to grow again. This may include transparency, honesty, and actions that reassure the betrayed partner.
Rebuilding Intimacy and Connection – Infidelity often damages emotional and physical intimacy. Counseling can help couples reconnect, rebuild affection, and address both emotional and physical needs.
Creating a Long-Term Plan for Healing – Rebuilding trust takes time and consistent effort. Counseling provides ongoing support, helping couples track their progress, navigate setbacks, and ensure that both partners are committed to the process.
While rebuilding trust after infidelity is challenging, couples counselling can provide the structure, tools, and emotional support needed for healing and rebuilding the relationship.
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Couple counselling can be incredibly helpful in navigating parenting disagreements by providing an open space for both partners to express their parenting concerns, fears, and expectations without judgment, helping each person feel heard and valued. Counsellors guide couples in discussing their differing approaches to discipline, values, and child-rearing strategies, encouraging compromise and collaboration. By identifying underlying emotions and beliefs that may be contributing to the conflict, therapy can help couples find common ground and align their parenting goals. Ultimately, relationship counselling can improve teamwork, reduce tension, and promote a united front, which is essential for raising children in a stable and supportive environment.
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Couples face various life transitions together, and these changes can bring both challenges and opportunities for growth. Common life transitions include:
Marriage or Commitment: Adjusting to shared responsibilities and expectations can create emotional stress, such as fear of losing individuality, concerns about compatibility, or anxieties around long-term commitment.
Parenthood: The arrival of children can strain relationships with new demands on time, energy, and attention. Couples may face exhaustion, changes in intimacy, role adjustments, and differences in parenting styles, leading to frustration or conflict.
Career Changes: Promotions, job losses, or shifts in career focus can affect a couple’s sense of stability and financial well-being. Emotional issues such as stress, resentment, or anxiety about future prospects can arise, especially if one partner feels unsupported or left behind.
Relocation or Moving: Relocating for work, family, or lifestyle reasons can disrupt a couple’s routine and social connections. This can lead to feelings of isolation, stress, and resentment, particularly if one partner is more reluctant to move than the other.
Health Challenges: Illness, injury, or aging can impact a couple’s emotional connection, sometimes creating feelings of fear, helplessness, and grief. Caregiving roles may be stressful, leading to burnout or shifts in relationship dynamics.
Empty Nest: When children leave home, couples may face an emotional shift, questioning their relationship and identity outside of parenting. There may be a sense of loss, loneliness, or anxiety about reinvesting in the relationship.
Financial Changes: Changes in financial status, such as debt, savings, or income fluctuation, can create stress and emotional strain. Disagreements about spending, saving, or long-term financial planning can lead to conflict or insecurity.
Retirement: Transitioning into retirement can affect a couple's daily routine, emotional connection, and sense of purpose. It can also bring up fears about aging, financial stability, and how to maintain an active and fulfilling relationship.
In these transitions, couples often encounter emotional challenges such as fear of change, loss of intimacy, stress, resentment, and anxiety. These changes can create a sense of uncertainty, leading to conflict or distancing if not managed with open communication, empathy, and a strong partnership. Couple counselling can provide support in navigating these transitions, helping couples strengthen their connection, align goals, and address emotional concerns effectively.
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Couples with neurodiversity (e.g., one or both partners having conditions like autism spectrum disorder, ADHD, or other neurological differences) may face unique challenges. These challenges can vary widely depending on the specific neurodiverse traits and the needs of each partner, but common challenges include:
Communication Differences: Neurodivergent individuals may have different styles of verbal or nonverbal communication, such as interpreting social cues, expressing emotions, or engaging in back-and-forth conversations. This can lead to misunderstandings, feelings of frustration, or emotional disconnect between partners.
Sensory Sensitivities: Sensory processing differences can create challenges in shared environments, especially if one partner is sensitive to noise, light, touch, or other stimuli. This may lead to irritability, overstimulation, or conflict over personal space and sensory preferences.
Emotional Regulation: Some neurodivergent individuals may struggle with regulating their emotions, leading to heightened reactions in stressful situations. This can result in arguments, difficulty managing conflicts, or emotional overwhelm that may be misinterpreted by the other partner.
Executive Functioning Issues: Challenges with executive functioning, such as organizing tasks, planning, time management, or completing chores, may impact household responsibilities or long-term goal setting. This can lead to feelings of resentment or burden if one partner feels like they’re shouldering more responsibility.
Social and Intimacy Expectations: One partner may have different needs or expectations when it comes to social interactions or intimacy, which can lead to misunderstandings or unmet needs. For example, a neurodivergent partner may struggle with physical affection or have different preferences for socializing, which can cause frustration for the other partner.
Routine and Predictability: Many neurodivergent individuals thrive on routine and predictability. Sudden changes or disruptions to plans may cause stress or anxiety, creating tension within the relationship if one partner is more flexible or spontaneous.
Stigma and External Pressure: Neurodivergent couples may also face external societal pressures or stigma, which can add stress to the relationship. The couple may feel the need to defend or explain their relationship to others, leading to frustration or a sense of isolation from family or friends.
Couple counselling for neurodiverse couples can be particularly helpful in navigating these challenges, providing tools for better communication, understanding, and emotional support. By addressing the specific needs and strengths of each partner, therapy can help build a stronger, more resilient relationship, fostering empathy and collaboration.
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Couple counselling can be a valuable resource during separation and divorce, helping partners navigate the complex emotions and practical challenges that arise. Even when a relationship is ending, counselling can provide support in several key areas:
Emotional Processing: Separation and divorce often bring up intense emotions such as grief, anger, sadness, guilt, or relief. Couple counselling helps individuals process these emotions in a healthy way, allowing both partners to express their feelings, understand each other's experiences, and manage emotional reactions constructively.
Improving Communication: Communication breakdown is a common issue in relationships leading to separation. Therapy can help couples improve their communication skills, enabling them to express their needs, resolve misunderstandings, and engage in more respectful, empathetic dialogue, even if the relationship is ending.
Navigating Co-Parenting: For couples with children, couple counselling can support the development of effective co-parenting strategies. It provides a space to discuss child custody, parenting styles, and how to prioritize the children’s well-being. The counsellor can also help reduce conflict between parents, fostering a collaborative approach to raising children after separation.
Clarifying and Managing Expectations: During separation and divorce, there are often complex decisions to be made about finances, property, and future plans. Couple counselling can assist in clarifying these expectations and working through difficult decisions in a way that minimizes conflict and promotes cooperation.
Healing and Closure: Sometimes, couples seek counselling during separation to gain closure and create a healthier sense of emotional separation. This can help both partners move forward more amicably, reducing lingering resentment or emotional attachment.
Exploring the Impact of the Relationship: Counselling provides an opportunity to reflect on the dynamics of the relationship, explore what worked and what didn’t, and help each partner gain insight into patterns of behavior. This self-awareness can be crucial in preventing similar issues in future relationships.
Coping with the Transition: Separation and divorce can be life-altering events. Therapy can help individuals cope with the transition, adjusting to new living situations, routines, and roles. It supports both partners in building resilience and managing the change in a way that promotes personal growth and healing.
Ultimately, couple counselling during separation and divorce provides a supportive environment where partners can address difficult emotions, communicate more effectively, and navigate the transition with more clarity, respect, and emotional support. Even if the goal is to end the relationship, counselling can help ensure that both partners part ways in a healthy, constructive manner.
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Talking about sex can sometimes feel difficult, awkward, or even embarrassing. Our couple counsellor create a comfortable, judgment-free space where you can explore your concerns openly.
Sex therapy is a specialised form of counselling designed to help individuals and couples enhance pleasure, reduce pain, and address challenges related to sexual well-being. It provides a safe, non-judgmental environment to explore sexuality, improve communication, and overcome shame or stigma surrounding sex.
It also helps with processing sexual trauma, understanding the impact of age on sexual health, and addressing concerns related to intimacy, identity, and relationships. Additionally, we offer support for sexual health (STIs), sex assistive aids (sex toys), and neurodiversity-related sex issues. >>Learn more about Sex Therapy
Meet Our Couple Counsellors
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Maxi Xie
Counsellor and Psychosexual Therapist
“Love and intimacy aren’t things we’re born knowing; sometimes, we need to learn to understand what feels healthy and comfortable for us. Every relationship has its own rhythm, and there’s no need to compare —what matters most is finding what works for you.”
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Chen Xu
Clinical Psychologist and Couple Counsellor
"Intimacy is not about just physical closeness, but about being seen, heard, and understood in the deepest parts of who we are. We are all searching for a partner who not only claim to love us, but truly sees us, hears us, and understands the deepest parts of our soul."
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Morty Ni
Counsellor
Couple Counselling FAQs
Do your couple counsellors have specialised training?
Our couple counsellor are registered psychologists or counsellor with extensive experience in counselling and psychotherapy. In addition, they completed Gottman Couple Therapy course and/or Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy course for specialised relationship counselling skills.
What if my partner doesn’t want to come to counselling?
It’s common for one partner to feel hesitant about couples counselling. If your partner doesn’t want to come, here are a few things to consider:
Understand Their Concerns – Ask your partner what’s holding them back. Are they worried about being blamed? Do they feel therapy won’t help? Addressing their fears can make them feel more comfortable.
Reframe Counseling as a Tool for Growth – Emphasize that therapy isn’t just for relationships in crisis—it’s about improving communication, understanding each other better, and strengthening your bond.
Consider Individual Counseling – If your partner refuses to attend, you can still benefit from therapy on your own. Working on your own emotional well-being and relationship patterns can create positive changes in the dynamic. Even if only one person starts therapy, meaningful relationship improvements can still happen
Invite Them to Just One Session – Sometimes, the idea of long-term therapy feels overwhelming. Suggest attending just one session together and leaving the decision open-ended.
Choose a Counselor Together – Letting your partner have a say in selecting the therapist can help them feel more in control and invested in the process.
Give Them Time – Some people need time to warm up to the idea. Be patient, and avoid pushing too hard, which may cause more resistance.
What if we’re considering separation—can counselling still help?
Yes, couples counselling can be helpful even if you’re considering separation. Therapy provides a supportive space to explore your feelings, communicate openly, and make informed decisions about your relationship.
Here’s how counseling can help in this situation:
Clarifying Your Feelings – If you’re unsure whether to stay together or separate, counseling can help both partners understand their emotions, needs, and concerns.
Improving Communication – Even if separation is likely, learning to communicate respectfully can make the process smoother, especially if children or shared responsibilities are involved.
Exploring Reconciliation – Some couples find that therapy helps them reconnect and address underlying issues, leading to renewed commitment rather than separation.
Preparing for a Healthy Separation – If you decide to part ways, counselling can help navigate the transition with less conflict, focusing on mutual respect and emotional well-being.
Can we do online sessions instead of in-person?
Generally our couple counsellors conduct couple counselling sessions in-person; however, if this is not practical, please contact us to discuss your individual circumstances.